In search of direction...

Ever feel like you lack direction? That's kind of where I'm at right now. Yes, I know God has a plan for me, and yes I know that things will work themselves out. I'm currently looking for a job and right now with the combination of the economy and my music degree, I'm finding it difficult. I found a job at a preschool I thought would have been perfect, but they hired someone before I came back into town from camp. I was in contact with them since April. Then I found a couple jobs at Westmont that looked like possible opportunities but my first choice position there closed, and my mom, who started working there this week, said they are already interviewing my second choice position there. The job market is practically non-existent to BA music degree students fresh out of college. At least, if I want to stay in my hometown. I asked God for direction at camp and God told me, "If you look to things that don't matter, that's what you will find. But, when you look to things that matter most, that's where you will find Me." I have nothing to do but place my trust in the Lord, and work hard in finding what I can for now.

I majored in music, voice being my primary instrument, because I loved to sing. That's it. Yes, it's that black and white. I don't want to be a performer. I'm not even sure if I want to teach, but it is a possibility. Now that I'm done with school, I wish I would have majored in liberal studies, to become a teacher, or something specified to an occupation such as music therapy, or music education, instead of just plain music. Don't get me wrong, I worked my butt off for a "just plain" music degree. Piano proficiency, history of western music, I could go on...

I'm working on a CD right now. Very amateur. I've recorded all 17 of my songs on garageband. I wrote half of them. You can hear the buzzing of the cheap computer microphone in the back of all the songs. Some songs are with my friend Sean on the guitar, or Laura on flute, others are duets, or covers, even some small group stuff we actually recorded in a studio. I've titled the CD "faith child." I love music, and I love singing, and I love composing. If I could get away with making a living writing music, and singing and recording it, without having to do concerts or be famous, I'd do it in a heartbeat. That is if people actually liked and wanted to buy my album. haha. But hey, I think most of it is pretty good.

But, what does God want me to do with my life? That's the right question to ask. What is my calling? I know it's with music, kids, and ministry. I thought since eighth grade I was supposed to be a pastor, but now I've discovered that there are so many forms of ministry, and that they do not all come in form of a pastor. It's still an option for the future though, I just don't think the timing is right, right now. God has given me the gifts of compassion, gentleness, kindness, singing, working with and relating to kids, as well as faith, and sharing God's love. My questions for you God are, "What is my next step? Where do you want me next? How can I better pray to hear your voice, and discern where You are calling me? How can I truly listen and open my heart and mind to what you are telling me?" I prayed for patience a lot after my freshman year of college, and now people say I am a patient person. It took patience before I got an answer of how to be patient. Be careful what you pray for... but... pray for it all the same. God knows what's on your heart. Why not ask for His help?

What do you need direction for in your life?

How can you better listen to God?

What are your gifts?

Do you/how do you ask God to help and guide you?