beauty

Beauty. One word. What is the first thing you think of when you hear this word? Physical appearance? The inner soul? I'm willing to bet that most people who say, "He/She is so beautiful," are referring to the person's physical appearance. But what is this mirage? And what does this say about humanity? Other words used to describe attractive physical appearance are hot, hansom, sexy, cute, pretty... the list seriously goes on and on! But when I say beauty I think of the person's inner being, the person's inner soul. Yes, there are people I think are attractive in appearance, but how much of this outer appearance reflects who they are as a person? I have seen very attractive men who catch my eye, but as soon as I hear them start "swearing like a sailor," or smoking, or whatever else turns me off I question my reasons for seeing them as "attractive" to begin with. What the eye sees is deceptive. You cannot tell the beauty of a person by what he/she looks like. Like "love at first sight?" Sorry, but this is lust at first sight. How would you know you love a person just by looking at them? Think about it... hmm...

Focus on that inner beauty a person possesses. My friends are truly some of the most beautiful people I know. The way Brittney looks at humanity and wants to help save the hurting women in the world. Or the way Tess (Theresa) literally wants to change the world through teaching and medicine. Look at Laura who wants every child in the world to have an education and travels all over the world evangelizing and teaching. Or Harmony who moved back to Zimbabwe following God's call to work with her church and teach music to kids. Or the joy that Anthony Eder shares through his words, actions, and smile. Rachel is moving to Asia to learn more about business and speak Mandarin so she can communicate with different cultures. I have never seen anyone love the way Aimee loves and is open to different ideas. Betsie's humor and friendship have meant more than anything to me. Camp and my SIT crew have brought more joy and beauty to my life than anything else. These are just a handful of beautiful people. I could go on about how each of my friends have touched my life and have changed my world.

The most beautiful person in the world is the person that follows God's call and strives to serve Him in every way possible, loves others more than he/she loves him/herself (the selfless person). This person loves so genuinely and is his/herself in all circumstances. S/he is not afraid of what others think, and has the confidence to stand up for what is right (the confident person). I am far from the most beautiful person in the world. Yes, I try to follow God's call and strive to serve him in every way possible. I definitely don't love others more than myself all the time, although I do try my best to put the needs of others first. I wish I considered myself a highly confident person, and I wish I could be myself in ALL circumstances, but the reality is this is the ideal, and no one can live up to being the ideally beautiful person. Why even try to be perfect when, guess what? We can't be! God is perfect. He is the ideal. He is beautiful!!! More beautiful than we could ever imagine or we could ever see! I have never seen God face to face but I know the day I do, I will fall even more madly in love with Him, for His love and inner beauty is so passionately selfless, and so ridiculously perfect and genuine. I never knew I could feel so much love. Most of all, God's beauty has touched my heart in its deepest place... the corners that could feel nothing at all until He brightened and lightened them with His compassion, forgiveness, joy, peace, trust, grace, BEAUTY, faith, hope, and L♥ve.

So, people of this world, look for the beauty of people that is rarely seen nor tapped into. The inner beauty of the outerly unattractive person (outerly is not a word but it works here). The inner beauty of everyone for that matter. And especially the beauty of God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

What inner beauty do you possess?

How does your outer appearance and inner beauty differ? Of others?

When have you judged someone strictly based on outer appearance?

What beauty do you recognize in others that others miss?

camp faith story

Camp is one of the most inspirational places I have been. I grew up going to El Camino Pines nearly every summer from about 3^rd through 9^th grade. My most memorable experience was confirmation camp, the summer after 8^th grade. I went up with my youth group, and on the night of the last campfire a pastor gave an inspirational talk and asked us if we wanted to rededicate our lives to Christ. I was inspired by the pastor’s words and felt called to make this commitment. I received a black wristband, along with many other people who came up. I sat back down at the campfire, looked up at the stars and began to cry because I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit deep inside of me. I felt this overwhelming peace and understanding from within, and knew that God was carrying all of my struggles and that everything was going to be okay. I still wear that wristband today as a reminder that my life is dedicated to God. It is one of those moments that I will never forget. The theme verse of the week was Micah 6:8, which is, “He has shown thee, of people, what is good, and what the Lord requires of thee. But to do justice, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God.” This became one of my confirmation verses when I was confirmed the next fall.

About six years later I found myself working at camp as a counselor. This was my fourth summer working at camp, and this time as the staff in training program director. I trained high school students to become future counselors and leaders.

What can I say? We have a blast a camp. It is so much fun. We are a close-knit community of believers. The campers learn about God and grow in their faith and are able to simply be themselves. The counselors are fun and outgoing, and their energy is contagious. Camp is a place that inspires kids. It stirs in them a longing to pursue God in their lives and to pursue their faith in all circumstances. They learn how to love others who are different from them because every camper is unique. Camp is about acceptance of who we are as children of God, and I can’t think of a better place, than at camp, to learn about the one who created us all. The relationships built at camp are truly life lasting.

Also, kids do not get to spend enough time outdoors. They are inside for school, when they watch TV or play videogames, but at camp that all changes. We pursue and enjoy the beauty of the outdoors. God’s creativity captures the kids when they step foot outside.

Here's just a quick story as I wrap up. There was a camper who at the beginning of the week, it was clear he did not want to be there. He was a high school football player, a “big, tough guy,” and he didn’t seem to want to talk about much when he arrived.” The week transformed him. We went white water rafting and I could see him open up and become vulnerable as he let down his guard. By the last day, he was telling everyone to keep in touch and that he would miss camp. This is just one story among many of how camp works in kids' lives. It has a lasting impact, as kids gain confidence and learn about discipleship. Camp has been a huge blessing in my life, and I see it bless so many kids.

http://www.lrcchome.com

This is the home page of Lutheran Retreats Camps and Conferences. Check it out!

In search of direction...

Ever feel like you lack direction? That's kind of where I'm at right now. Yes, I know God has a plan for me, and yes I know that things will work themselves out. I'm currently looking for a job and right now with the combination of the economy and my music degree, I'm finding it difficult. I found a job at a preschool I thought would have been perfect, but they hired someone before I came back into town from camp. I was in contact with them since April. Then I found a couple jobs at Westmont that looked like possible opportunities but my first choice position there closed, and my mom, who started working there this week, said they are already interviewing my second choice position there. The job market is practically non-existent to BA music degree students fresh out of college. At least, if I want to stay in my hometown. I asked God for direction at camp and God told me, "If you look to things that don't matter, that's what you will find. But, when you look to things that matter most, that's where you will find Me." I have nothing to do but place my trust in the Lord, and work hard in finding what I can for now.

I majored in music, voice being my primary instrument, because I loved to sing. That's it. Yes, it's that black and white. I don't want to be a performer. I'm not even sure if I want to teach, but it is a possibility. Now that I'm done with school, I wish I would have majored in liberal studies, to become a teacher, or something specified to an occupation such as music therapy, or music education, instead of just plain music. Don't get me wrong, I worked my butt off for a "just plain" music degree. Piano proficiency, history of western music, I could go on...

I'm working on a CD right now. Very amateur. I've recorded all 17 of my songs on garageband. I wrote half of them. You can hear the buzzing of the cheap computer microphone in the back of all the songs. Some songs are with my friend Sean on the guitar, or Laura on flute, others are duets, or covers, even some small group stuff we actually recorded in a studio. I've titled the CD "faith child." I love music, and I love singing, and I love composing. If I could get away with making a living writing music, and singing and recording it, without having to do concerts or be famous, I'd do it in a heartbeat. That is if people actually liked and wanted to buy my album. haha. But hey, I think most of it is pretty good.

But, what does God want me to do with my life? That's the right question to ask. What is my calling? I know it's with music, kids, and ministry. I thought since eighth grade I was supposed to be a pastor, but now I've discovered that there are so many forms of ministry, and that they do not all come in form of a pastor. It's still an option for the future though, I just don't think the timing is right, right now. God has given me the gifts of compassion, gentleness, kindness, singing, working with and relating to kids, as well as faith, and sharing God's love. My questions for you God are, "What is my next step? Where do you want me next? How can I better pray to hear your voice, and discern where You are calling me? How can I truly listen and open my heart and mind to what you are telling me?" I prayed for patience a lot after my freshman year of college, and now people say I am a patient person. It took patience before I got an answer of how to be patient. Be careful what you pray for... but... pray for it all the same. God knows what's on your heart. Why not ask for His help?

What do you need direction for in your life?

How can you better listen to God?

What are your gifts?

Do you/how do you ask God to help and guide you?